Welcome to Varanasi,
Last night i arrived in varanasi, land of the dying hoping to end the cycle of birth and death, land of siva the destroyer, land of classical music... i have been dreaming of this place for years and last night i got off the crazy 24-hour train ride with two new israeli companions. after getting dropped off somewhere - not where we'd hoped - we took to the ghats to walk along and find Shanti guest house... struggling under heavy packs, i step in cow shit that is now all over my toes. hello Siva. but the ghats are so incredible - 40, 50 concrete stairs lining the river, to our left is up to the huge city, busy winding street and huge concrete building showing the brick beneath in gorgeous broken pieces, and to my right, the ganges in the dark with a light haze... when we can barely walk anymore, we arrive - the burning ghat - it would not have been my choice to see this on the first night, but this is where we are meeting others, so we go towards the the steps with numerous piles of burning fires, burning humans lives away to salvation, bright orange, and lighting up the indian faces, concrete jungles, and shimmering river of purification... up we go, and arrive at shanti guest house where i am today in a community of israelis, belly-aching, sweating from every pore, and quite content.
on the train i finally had the chance to write, and as i feel i have been simplifying too much in this journal, and i am not well from the train food, i would like to copy you a few pages - we will see how far we get. but this is all to recap the journey thus far in greater detail. enjoy.
i came from vrindavan - 3 days with my hindu hosts watching them make pilgrimage and feeling stuck - wanting to break off on my own to allow life to happen in the ways that you need requires a certain mind state... i was not there, stifled, unexpressive. i stayed long enough tthat i might not insult them ortrample my free will... they helped me, of corse to get used to the place, who i can trust, what food is safe, how to get to the bus... once on the bus i am hesitant to take it with only 2 other men on board and now i experience the language barrier as i can not find out if others will be joining us later or if i can switch tickets and go tomorrow… no luck. I have a strong intuition that I should just go. One of the men is very helpful and a young hare krishna gets on, okay, jayenge, we go. But I should have watched what I wished for. At the next stop, the bus fills to brim with indian men. It is night, and I am squished up in luxury coach, referring to the luxury of 60-yr-old school bus, for an overnight trip hiding in my sweatshipr so no one will see m, pretending to be asleep and about to have tmost uncomforable night as the dude next to me falls asleep with his elbow in my ribs and his thigh squished up to mine – and this even wit the seat on his left empty…
Well I arrive, and an hour early. It is still dark. I have no clue how to get to rishikesh, but rikshaws pick me up right outside the bus – 150 rupee, probably too much, but I just want to get there. I am droped off in ram jhula – I say parmrath ashram, and I’m pointed across the brige. The rickshaw can’t go, so I am off on foot. The ashram isn’t too far, but when I arrive in registration they aare aking for $300 US. This is too much. They wan’t let me come for a few days. What to do? I will try the sivananda ashram. I cross back and navigate through Siv – which is a big free hospital. Quite different. In the office they, as expected, ask if I have written for a reservation. Even my telling them about being staff for 7 months does nothing. They send me next door. I’m not feeling the vibe there either. I go back out. Where to now? A yoga class lets out a nd I see westerners. I go over seeking help, but I’m not sure what I ‘mlooking for, what to ask?
I don’t feel the vibe from them either… well… the only thing left is , I have a date with the Ganges as per my dream had over a year ago where a voice said “pay attention to how you feel the first time you sit at the banks of the Ganges”… so I guess it’s a good time for this. In front of me are ghats down. It’s not like a beach, like in the dream, but good enough. I go down and sit in padmasan and focus on how I fell – I see light dancing on the water and I fell… like everything is going to be okay. I see 2 westerners sitting nearby and I don’t quite know what to say o how to approach but I just relax, and sit. Within seconds they get up and notice me. The guy smiles and says ‘did you just get here?” “yeah” “Are you looking for a place to stay?” YES! And that waas it. We go for chai in a nearby shop and I have lunch. They tell me about a place mile or so away called bombay guest house where there are many ‘really chill’ travellers laying music every night and just good energy – perfect! They are going to the yoga conference, and though the bombay is usually hard to score a room at, because they just left, I have a chance… I get a nice room and that night I share my voice around an indoor/outdoor fire with many nice new wetsern traveller faces. By the next evening I have met Sanjeev and Misha at a restaurant next door and only somewhat involved in the bombay, but their company disappoints me and misha pursues me too hard . The next day I discover the bombay scene and a new world begins…
on the train i finally had the chance to write, and as i feel i have been simplifying too much in this journal, and i am not well from the train food, i would like to copy you a few pages - we will see how far we get. but this is all to recap the journey thus far in greater detail. enjoy.
i came from vrindavan - 3 days with my hindu hosts watching them make pilgrimage and feeling stuck - wanting to break off on my own to allow life to happen in the ways that you need requires a certain mind state... i was not there, stifled, unexpressive. i stayed long enough tthat i might not insult them ortrample my free will... they helped me, of corse to get used to the place, who i can trust, what food is safe, how to get to the bus... once on the bus i am hesitant to take it with only 2 other men on board and now i experience the language barrier as i can not find out if others will be joining us later or if i can switch tickets and go tomorrow… no luck. I have a strong intuition that I should just go. One of the men is very helpful and a young hare krishna gets on, okay, jayenge, we go. But I should have watched what I wished for. At the next stop, the bus fills to brim with indian men. It is night, and I am squished up in luxury coach, referring to the luxury of 60-yr-old school bus, for an overnight trip hiding in my sweatshipr so no one will see m, pretending to be asleep and about to have tmost uncomforable night as the dude next to me falls asleep with his elbow in my ribs and his thigh squished up to mine – and this even wit the seat on his left empty…
Well I arrive, and an hour early. It is still dark. I have no clue how to get to rishikesh, but rikshaws pick me up right outside the bus – 150 rupee, probably too much, but I just want to get there. I am droped off in ram jhula – I say parmrath ashram, and I’m pointed across the brige. The rickshaw can’t go, so I am off on foot. The ashram isn’t too far, but when I arrive in registration they aare aking for $300 US. This is too much. They wan’t let me come for a few days. What to do? I will try the sivananda ashram. I cross back and navigate through Siv – which is a big free hospital. Quite different. In the office they, as expected, ask if I have written for a reservation. Even my telling them about being staff for 7 months does nothing. They send me next door. I’m not feeling the vibe there either. I go back out. Where to now? A yoga class lets out a nd I see westerners. I go over seeking help, but I’m not sure what I ‘mlooking for, what to ask?
I don’t feel the vibe from them either… well… the only thing left is , I have a date with the Ganges as per my dream had over a year ago where a voice said “pay attention to how you feel the first time you sit at the banks of the Ganges”… so I guess it’s a good time for this. In front of me are ghats down. It’s not like a beach, like in the dream, but good enough. I go down and sit in padmasan and focus on how I fell – I see light dancing on the water and I fell… like everything is going to be okay. I see 2 westerners sitting nearby and I don’t quite know what to say o how to approach but I just relax, and sit. Within seconds they get up and notice me. The guy smiles and says ‘did you just get here?” “yeah” “Are you looking for a place to stay?” YES! And that waas it. We go for chai in a nearby shop and I have lunch. They tell me about a place mile or so away called bombay guest house where there are many ‘really chill’ travellers laying music every night and just good energy – perfect! They are going to the yoga conference, and though the bombay is usually hard to score a room at, because they just left, I have a chance… I get a nice room and that night I share my voice around an indoor/outdoor fire with many nice new wetsern traveller faces. By the next evening I have met Sanjeev and Misha at a restaurant next door and only somewhat involved in the bombay, but their company disappoints me and misha pursues me too hard . The next day I discover the bombay scene and a new world begins…
posted by Renee | 1:26 AM
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